Christmas Italian Style

Twas the
night before Christmas,
Da whole house was mella,
Not a creature was stirrin,

Cuz I had a gun unda da pilla.

When up on da roof
I heard somethin
pound,
I sprung to da window,
To scream, "YO! Keep it down!"

When
what to my
Wanderin eyes should appear,
But da Don of all elfs,
And eight
friggin reindeer!

Wit slicked back black hair,
And a silk red suit,
/>don Christopher wuz here,
And he brought da loot!

Wit a slap to dare
snouts,
And a yank on dare manes,
He cursed and he shouted,
And he called
dem by name.

"Yo Tony, Yo Frankie,
Yo Vinny, Yo Vito,
Ay Joey, Ay
Paulie,
Ay Pepe, Ay Guido!"

As I drew out my gun
And hid by da bed,

He flew troo da winda
And slapped me side da head.

"What da hell you
doin
Pullin a gun on da Don?
Now all youre gettin is coal,
You friggin
moron!"

Den pointin a fat finga
Right unda my nose,
He twisted his
pinky ring,
And up da chimney he rose.

He sprang to his sleigh,
/>Obscenities screamin,
Away dey all flew,
Before he troo dem a beatin.

/>Den I heard him yell out,
What I did least expect,
"Merry Friggin Christmas
to all,
And yous better show some
respect!"